jesus christ …

what a night. who was it saying ‘with great power comes great responsibility’? How come i do feel that weight on me, but my men obviously do not? One is actually supporting me a great deal, although i do not claim he should, other is takin’ takin’ takin – and doesn’t have the slightest idea of how much energy he sucks from me. From his point of view he’s leavin’ me alone as much as i need it. i do not subscribe to that … wait, let’s start from the beginning …

project givin’ me troubles, nightwork comes from that. partner leaves me alone. so far so good. but i know for sure: tomorrow he’ll complain about me not havin’ come over after work. i do feel the oncoming pressure out of that beforehand … need holidays. desperately. being left alone for a woman pretty rarely means to be left alone for good. got to change lot of things … this is all draining my energy. but where to begin? and how?